Aikido as a way of life.

Is aikido ever emotionally painful? Answer: Yes, sometimes so much so that I want to cut and run. But I stay because that is that I was taught to do and that is what I teach others to do. Our dojo is a safe place to meet your self.  Sometimes I don’t like what I find. I can stay anyway. The next uke attacks and I throw. When it is my turn to attack, I do and I receive the throw. My mind gets quieted through the practice. My attention to others relieves me of my self-centered fears and self-doubt. Regard for others always helps me come back to what is important. For me what is important is the safety of the space, the constancy of training and the peace that comes from mind-full attention.

Answer: Because the body is like a wild pony. It has to be trained to your bidding. If we let our hands just land willy-nilly all the time we do not develop good habits.  We ask our body to do something a certain why and then work to develop that way by training.  Aikido affords us the opportunity to accept feedback without judgment and to work that feedback into our movement to create correct feeling and impeccable technique. Another reason it matters where we place our hands is because we want to be mindful every moment in class and out of class. By paying attention to details we set the intention for our hands to go a certain way and then we follow with the movement to come as close to that intention as we can. This practice helps us develop mind body co-ordination and gives us a reference for how we can be at all times. We can notice distractions like problems or compliments and then come back to our centers and be   paying attention to all the details of our ...

Question: How does aikido change me? Answer: Just the act of stepping out on the mat with an open mind begins the process. For example:  Nage says: “When uke grabs me like that I can’t move.” Sensei then shows us how to move when we are grabbed like that. We move what we can. Ourselves. We don’t move what we can’t…someone else. Our moving changes the relationship between us. Harmony is re-established through the process.  The process creates a feeling in both uke and nage of peacefulness that they can pass along to others. Out in the real life dojo the same thing can happen. Me: “So and so makes me feel (insert a feeling word here such as angry, frustrated, happy…)”.  Then I get to look at the lie that I just thought. So and so can’t make me feel anything. My feelings come from my own judgments and thoughts and desires:  things I can change. So if conversations or experiences with so and so make me feel  (again insert your feeling word of choice) I ca...

I have been thinking about what someone said about this moment they had in college where the perfect feeling happened. He looked at the basket and knew the ball was going into the basket. Then this person said they were searching for that feeling again. I think searching for any feeling is a mistake. The now is missed by trying to recreate it. Another feeling might happen but it will be when mind and body are coordinated again. Not when the mind and body are trying or when the mind is longing for something that happened in the past. Paying attention to what is, accepting what is and moving with what is, is the practice. I have those feelings all the time. I never look for the feeling. It emerges out of the now and me paying attention to what is.

Whenever we say "No, I am right," we stop the flow of communication...when we insist that uke move this way or that way by force uke will resist and get stiff. It becomes a battle of wills and the stronger physical person will win. They will be right. Aikido is being open to what is and what will be. Uke attacks. I let uke move within the bounds of suggestion and encouragement. By adding my own energy and providing direction the throw is accomplished.  Am I right? Maybe... maybe not...yet it feels so much better than forcing my way on someone else.

Is it easier to blame some one else rather than take responsibly for how we feel? Not in the long run because it is a lie. Lies cause tension in the body and contribute to rigid thinking. Stiff mind, stiff body. Relax the mind and the body relaxes. Relax the body and the mind relaxes. Uke grabs, holds tight and doesn't move like we think they should. We can feel how we feel and chuckle at the need to blame. Then we can relax and do our best with the technique that we are learning. We can ask for help if we need it. Blaming another or ourselves is not an effective training tool. It distracts us from what we can change: our bodies, minds and spirits. 

A challenge for now, can I be a warrior for compassion and kindness when I feel like the universe conspires to hold me down? I see those thoughts march by and chuckle to myself “Let’s pick another story for these feelings.” Let’s practice our practice no matter what thoughts and feelings arise from the fecundity of our humanness. Let’s reap the rewards of our practice. It is here and now and true.