even if I am broken or bent? "Of course!" I say to others.
Inside me there is a tiny voice that says "NO, go hide until you are better. Don't drag your chair out on the mat and throw. How embarrassing! What will people think?"
The little voice...(I have named her Mildred), is a negative part of my brain that would like me isolated, alone, drinking myself to death.
As I sat in my chair in class yesterday I noticed she had really quieted down, especially after I led warm ups. After I got to throw shomen uchi sankyo from my chair she completely disappeared. Have you ever noticed that when you shine the flashlight of your heart on the demons in your mind the demons melt away into the nothingness.
See ya on the mat. I will be the one in the chair for a little while longer until my knee really heals.