Aikido as a way of life.

Drifting? What the heck is that? It’s sort of like taking up slack…but it is really paying more attention to which way uke wants to go and letting them go that way. Every time I am grabbed I notice where uke is heading. By letting uke go in the direction they want to… all resistance disappears. By paying attention from my center I am able to let my uke lead and follow simultaneously as I start the technique that will happen between us. The world gets quiet and still as uke grabs and follows as I lead the drift and connection that creates the feeling that is Aikido. The peace and relaxation that follows calms my spirit and restores harmony in me and hopefully my uke.

This can be a long, lonely journey or one that is a complete adventure. Each class provides yet another opportunity to meet yourself. My journey is both…though mostly, lately it is filled with joy. I have hung in there though the hard parts. Through classes that seemed like I am never going to get it and that everyone else gets it. Through times where people have left our dojo because of what and how I was teaching. Through times where Ron’s teacher acted badly and I wanted to leave and Ron wasn’t ready to leave yet. Through times where my oldest daughter was missing for months and I would cry at every class. Through classes where there was 25 people on the mat and times where there is 3 including Ron and I. Through a dojo that was in a dirty youth center basement where the roof leaked and kids ran all over the mat with their shoes on. Through teaching everywhere and anywhere I could; churches, schools, colleges, town fairs, inside and outside, company seminars, weird collections of va

This morning I had a moment that almost hurt with joy. It was a small class. The sun was shining. All the windows and doors were open giving the illusion of being outside. The air was clear. The fans created a slight breeze. I could smell woods, blossoms and sweat. We were practicing ryote tori shiho nage... focusing on bending uke's elbow with the second hand, keeping nage's arms on a horizontal plane and doing an L step. I used to Hate, Hate, Hate shiho nage. A couple of years ago I decided to change my perspective. I embraced shiho nage. At first, I was definitely acting as if. Now I am loving it. I am still not great at it. There are awkward moments. However, my self acceptance and my openness to each unique uke and moment are increasing. I have declared this the summer of shiho nage . Each class we do shiho nage from some attack. I am focusing on three fundamental aspects. Who knows? By winter the awkward moments could be less as I relax more and more. I let go of the be